Last Saturday, I hit a wall. Hard. Not a metaphorical wall, but one of those emotional brick walls that leaves a dent. No idea why, no warning. One minute, I was fine. The next, I was unraveling faster than a sweater caught on a nail. Brain? Autopilot. Emotions? Chaos. And somewhere in the middle, that tiny, annoying voice asked, “Shouldn’t you be better at this by now?” Oh, absolutely. Because life is supposed to come with a user manual, right?

Naturally, I did what any sane person would do in a crisis: I overthought my way through it. Armed with caffeine and a laptop, I wrote a blog post to try to make sense of the mess. Spoiler: I’m still figuring it out.

Sunday: The Glimmer of “Okay”

I woke up on Sunday with one promise: move first, think later. It took 15 minutes to talk myself out of bed (hello, snooze button), but I finally made it to spin class at 9 a.m. Was it a life-altering experience? Not quite. But did I get up and move? Yes. I’ll call that a win.

The rest of the day was a mix of candles, a walk, and the faintest hint of okay-ness. Not dancing-through-fields-of-flowers happy, but hey, at least I wasn’t crying-in-the-shower sad. Small victories, my friends. Small victories.

Monday: Brain, Overload Mode

Monday rolled around, and I dragged myself into a half-hearted workout. Life-changing? Absolutely not. But hey, at least I showed up. The rest of the day? A haze of screens and my brain running in circles, getting nowhere fast. By evening, I found myself working in bed (classic move, bad boundaries) and doing the exact opposite of recharging.

Filed under: Who needs sleep anyway? (Answer: me, apparently.)

Tuesday: The Universe Has It Out For Me

Ah, Tuesday. You had it out for me, didn’t you? By 7 p.m., I was ready to raise the white flag, curl up in bed, and hope for a miracle. I’ve had this headache for six days, but today it wedged itself right behind my eyes, making everything feel heavier. Every tiny inconvenience today felt like the universe’s way of messing with me: the printer jammed, the scanner quit, and my power block died.

Normal Tuesday me would’ve shrugged it off. But no. Today I was fragile. So, what did I do? I went to TK Maxx - because when life is in shambles, why not wander aimlessly through chaos in retail form? Next stop, Primark (aka 'Primani') where I bought the wrong-sized coats for the boys (stellar parenting, I know) and ended the day feeling like I was one step away from losing it completely. Luke keeps saying I’m fine, but honestly, I’m just one more wrong-sized coat away from signing myself up for a padded room and some peace and quiet. So, you know, Tuesday was great.

Wednesday: The Glimmer of Hope I Didn’t See Coming

Wednesday surprised me. It started with my son dramatically announcing, “Mum, there are no school jumpers.” Gone. Vanished. So, I grabbed the crumpled jumper from yesterday, sponged out the stains, called it “vintage,” and sent him on his way. Crisis averted.

But here’s the plot twist: Wednesday actually delivered. Esme was in the office, so I could finally breathe. And Luke saw his consultant, which was a huge relief. No answers yet, but just knowing someone’s paying attention to his pain was a weight off my shoulders.

I even managed to exchange the boys’ coats (apparently, I don’t know their sizes anymore) and grabbed some backup school jumpers. Chaos? Bring it.

By evening, things started to feel lighter. Turns out, the stress over Luke was draining me more than I realised. But now? I feel okay. The jumper crisis is solved, the kids have coats that actually fit, and Luke’s finally on someone’s radar.

So, Wednesday, you unpredictable gem, thanks for showing up. You’ve been surprisingly kind.

Thursday: Curtains, Candles, and Chocolate Regrets

Thursday arrived, and I decided to create the perfect work-from-home vibe - curtains drawn, candles flickering, fully embracing my inner productivity monk. The plan was simple: no distractions, just pure focus. Then, of course, I demolished an entire box of Ferrero Rocher that was supposed to be a gift for a friend. Who needs friends anyway? (Okay, I do. Sorry, friend.)

In penance for my chocolate crime, I went to Body Combat. Not for fitness, mind you. Just for redemption. Afterward, I bumped into a few people I knew, and had one of those “Oh right, human connection is actually crucial” moments. I tend to convince myself I’m fine flying solo, like some kind of lone wolf, but deep down? I’m not. Those small moments, those chats, they really do make a difference. I felt so much better afterward.

The day wrapped up with a trip to Asda to prep for the boys’ birthday. I even celebrated with prosecco. Because if you’re going to survive the chaos, might as well do it with bubbles, right?

Friday: Prosecco Regrets and Domestic Triumphs

Ah, Friday. I woke up with a headache that screamed, “Remember me? The prosecco? You fool!” I sighed, popped some paracetamol, and dragged myself to spin class.

Instead of diving straight into work, I decided to slow down. No deadlines. Just a quiet day of appreciating the little things. I even reminisced about Christmas as a kid with the receptionist. And for the first time all week, I felt present. Overwhelm? Gone. Mood? Okay.

That afternoon, I picked up the kids from school, fully aware that my evening plans were about to be anything but glamorous. The agenda? Scrubbing the bathroom (which I’ve heroically ignored all week), tidying up the house (because apparently, chaos isn’t a valid home décor choice), and wrapping birthday presents for the kids. I’d love a robot to take over these chores, but until science catches up, I’ll bask in my brief triumph of a tidy house.

The Moral of the Story: You’ve Got This (Even If You Don’t Feel Like It)

This week was a rollercoaster. And not one of those fun, “yay, theme park!” rides. More like a “please make it stop” kind of rollercoaster. But guess what? I made it. Life is messy, and progress is rarely perfect. Sometimes just surviving the lows, embracing the ‘meh,’ and celebrating the small wins is enough.

It’s not about huge transformations or instant fixes. It’s about showing up, day by day, and trying again. So if you’re in the thick of it, remember: progress is still progress, even when it’s wrapped in chaos. You’ll get there, one messy step at a time. And when you do? Maybe skip the prosecco. Or don’t. Honestly, you might handle it better than I did!

How to Make Small Changes to Improve Yourself?

Life isn’t a straight line. One moment you’re steady, the next you’re spiraling. But here’s the truth - your feelings are valid, full stop. They don’t need to be compared or justified by anyone else’s situation. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, sad, or uncertain, even if someone else seems to have it harder. Feelings show up uninvited, and that’s just how it is. But they’re never permanent. Just like moments of joy eventually fade, the tough ones will pass too. 

This week, I pulled myself out of a Tuesday-sized emotional pit and realised it’s time to make some small, intentional changes. Nothing huge - just small, tough steps to quietly guide my life closer to where I want it to be. It won’t be easy, especially when it means tackling the hard stuff, but I know it’ll be worth it.

Next week, I’ll check in and share how it’s going - one awkward, imperfect step at a time. Progress might not be pretty, but hey, it’s still progress.