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Kale Smoothie Complete: My Unexpected Victory!

well-being Dec 29, 2024

BOOM.

MIC. DROP.

MISSION COMPLETE.

Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve officially peaked. I made the kale smoothie.

I know, I know - hold your applause. Actually, no, don’t. I deserve this moment.

Now, I’d leave it at that, but let’s be real - most of you have no idea what I’m talking about because you probably haven’t read my kale-related blog post. Shame on you! But don’t worry, I’ve got you covered. Here’s the link for you to catch up. I’ll wait. 😐

Alright, now that you’re fully caught up on the monumental achievement that is my kale smoothie (seriously, who saw this day coming?), here I am - smoothie in hand, staring into the void and wondering what on earth to ramble on about next. Hmm... How about I bore you all with an overview of my week and desperately try to extract some profound life lesson from it? Because as we all know, I live for trying to find hidden lessons in my chaotic, bizarre existence. And when I squint my eyes hard enough, I can almost always find one. Almost. 🕵️‍♀️

Lost in Time: Spin Class and the Post-Holiday Fog

Today is Sunday… Wait, no, it’s Saturday. Or is it? Honestly, who even knows anymore? It’s that strange, in-between zone between Christmas and New Year where time loses all meaning. The days blend together, loungewear becomes a 24/7 uniform, and no one has any clue what they’re supposed to be doing - or if they even should be doing anything at all. 😕

But there was one thing I actually managed to do today - attend spin class. Yep, you read that right. Spin on a Sunday morning is usually part of my routine, but I’ve missed it the past week. So, I dragged my post-holiday, half-asleep self to the gym, fully expecting to zombie my way through it. Naturally, I hid in my trusty back corner - the unofficial safe zone for people who’d rather not be noticed in their half-functional state.

And you know what? Even in my sluggish state, I actually enjoyed it. Who would've guessed? By the end, I was fully into it - definitely not what I expected on a Sunday morning! 💥

But let’s talk about the aftermath: The Lobster Effect. Every time I push myself in exercise, I turn an alarming shade of red - like, “is she okay?” red. It’s not a radiant post-workout glow; it’s a "someone get her some ice water" situation. 🦞

When I got home, Luke took one look at me and couldn't stop grinning. Rude. Hey, my capillaries just happen to be super close to the surface, alright? Don’t judge me.

The Nostalgia-Fueled Run

Today's spin class was my first workout since that epic solo run last Saturday. And by "epic," I mean I barely made it 15 minutes before seriously considering retreating back to my sofa. But then, like a gift from the universe, a song came on - not just any song, but a song I used to run to back in the day. It wasn’t even upbeat, but the lyrics hit me like an emotional freight train. 🫀 Suddenly, I was running with purpose. For the next 15 minutes, I hit “repeat” and let that song carry me through. No shame. Of course, by the next day, I had completely overplayed it. But that's a me problem. 😳

From Holiday Bliss to The Grind

Between Christmas and today, I’ve been soaking up the holiday vibes. Lazy mornings, quality time with family, and enough festive food to put me in a permanent food coma. I’ve also squeezed in some much-needed Netflix binges, which have been a rare treat lately. My top pick? The Six Triple Eight. It’s a true gem - powerful acting and a story that’s even more impactful because it’s based on real events. These past few days have been nothing short of glorious, but, as always, they’ve flown by way too quickly.

And now, tomorrow marks my official return to work.😨

I know what you’re thinking: "But it’s your own business, right? Don’t you work on your own terms?" Yes, and yes. But that doesn’t mean I’m immune to the dreaded Sunday-night scaries. It’s not the work itself - I genuinely love what I do. It’s that brutal shift from holiday-mode to productivity-mode that hits hard. One minute, you’re lounging on the sofa binge-watching Netflix, and the next, you’re staring down a to-do list that feels like it’s never-ending.

It’s a vibe shift, and I’m just trying to find my rhythm again.

And Now… The Kale

Now, I know what you’re thinking: Is this blog post long enough? Probably not. So, let me share the thrilling tale of how I procured my kale. Brace yourselves - this is edge-of-your-seat stuff.

I went to Morrisons.
I found the kale.
I put it in my trolley.

That’s it. That’s the story. 🤯

I’d include a photo of the kale, but let’s be honest: kale isn’t exactly photogenic. It’s the kind of vegetable that looks like it’s been through some things - tough, leafy things. But hey, it works wonders in smoothies, and that’s all that matters. As for my smoothie? Let’s just say it’s not exactly Pinterest-worthy. But when I finally perfect one that doesn’t look like sludge, I’ll be sure to share it here. Deal?

Closing Thoughts

So, here we are. I’ve rambled about kale, workouts, and the existential dread of post-holiday life. Is this blog post long enough now? Probably. And honestly, I don’t think I’ve uncovered any profound life lessons in all of this. I blame the post-Christmas fog.

I’ll leave you with this: Keep calm, embrace the chaos, and maybe try a kale smoothie. Or don’t. Either way, I’ll be here, living my weird, wonderful life and overthinking it all.

Until next time, friends. ✌️

Oh, and it’s Sunday... it’s definitely Sunday.

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