Okay, hold onto your seat because I've got a bombshell for you: I am not a domestic goddess. I know, I know, you’re probably picking your jaw up off the floor right now, but hear me out.
When the Kids Spilled the Tea
When Luke was going through chemo, one of my kids casually dropped this gem: he told his teacher that he actually preferred the school dinners to my cooking. Ouch, right? But hey, I get it - school dinners have come a long way. I mean, remember when Jamie Oliver actually saved those school meals from the disaster that was my childhood? Back then, mashed potatoes were more like lumps of mystery and custard came out pink for reasons no one really understood. So, I’m not too offended.
Not Exactly the Queen of the Kitchen
Let’s be honest for a moment: I’m no culinary queen. Sure, I regularly whip up a basic pasta dish (which, by the way, the boys are now totally over), but when it comes to creating those beautifully crafted meals that make everyone’s taste buds sing? Not really my thing. I’d much rather leave it to someone else and focus on, well, literally anything else. Thankfully, Luke loves cooking, so he happily takes charge in the kitchen. He even tried once to rope me in, insisting it would be fun (seriously?!), but I was armed with every excuse under the sun. Cooking together? Definitely not my idea of a fun night.
Cleaning? I Do It Because I Have To
Now, don’t get me wrong – I absolutely appreciate the meals Luke whips up, and I know the boys are beyond grateful that he’s taken over most of the cooking duties. But if Luke weren’t around? Let’s just say I’d probably be surviving on whatever’s easiest and quickest. As for cleaning? I do it, but only because it’s one of those necessary evils - washing, tidying, general upkeep. But let’s be honest, it’s not my passion. I’m not writing sonnets about scrubbing floors. In fact, just last Friday, I was supposed to clean the bathroom. I got halfway through, took one look at it, and thought, "Yeah, not today," then walked away. So... yep, the bathroom’s still waiting. 🙃
When the boys were younger, I’d stress myself out trying to keep the house clean for every guest who showed up. But now? My priorities have definitely shifted. I look back and think, "Why did I care so much about what my house looked like for other people?" Don’t get me wrong - my home isn’t a wreck. It’s just not pristine in a way that would make Martha Stewart proud. I guess some things are just lower on the to-do list now.
Water Shortage? Just a Metaphor
So, a little while ago, I made Luke a herbal tea. He picked up the cup and asked if there was a water shortage because it was only half full. Honestly, I just misjudged the water levels in the kettle. But, in a weird way, it felt like a metaphor for my entire approach to household tasks these days - just enough to get by, but not exactly overflowing with effort.
Coming to Terms With It
I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that I’m not cut out for the whole "domestic goddess" life. I’d like to think that, if I tried hard enough, I could pull it off. But honestly? It’s just not worth the effort anymore. Back in the day, I could whip up a decent shepherd’s pie (Ainsley Harriott’s recipe, which uses ketchup... I know, right?). But now? I just can’t be bothered, and honestly, I don’t have the time. Well, that’s a lie - we all have time; it’s just about how we prioritise it.
Why I'd Make a Terrible Wife
I remember chatting with an investment manager in London once, and he told me I’d make a terrible wife because I don’t like cooking. Honestly, the thought of being married to someone and having to cook for them every night? Total nightmare fuel. I’d probably get way too creative with the ingredients - “Oh, you want pasta? Here’s a bowl of spaghetti hoops with a sprinkle of hot sauce for a kick. Bon appétit!” 😬
Shoutout to the Everyday Cooks
But seriously, huge praise to all the men and women out there who cook for their families every single day. You deserve a medal. How do you do it? Coming up with something new every night, knowing your partner and kids are expecting a meal? It’s incredible! I can barely remember to make myself lunch, let alone plan dinner for the whole week.
Culinary Superheroes... Or Just Superheroes?
When I think of my grandma, I can’t help but think, “You had it way harder than me.” Raising three kids and cooking for them every day? I can’t even imagine. Meanwhile, I’m celebrating life if I clean the bathroom once a week or tidy up when the house hits that “uh-oh, it’s time to clean” stage. My mum was the same - four kids, a demanding job, and somehow she still managed to whip up these incredible meals. Sunday roast dinners, followed by a homemade crumble for dessert? That’s some next-level stuff right there. My mum and grandma were basically culinary superheroes. I mean, I can't even imagine being that organised at home. 🤯
The Struggle Is Real: Maybe This Year Will Be Different
So yeah, the struggle is real. It’s all about priorities, right? If you love this stuff, great… I mean, weird, but great! But let’s be honest, a lot of it? You just have to do. And let’s face it, it’s just not my thing - and probably never will be. I’ve toyed with the idea of getting a cleaner, but that’s a whole new blog post in itself. Honestly, hiring a cleaner feels like a mindset thing for me. I always catch myself thinking, I should be able to do it all myself or Who am I to hire someone to clean for me? But anyway, I’ll leave that thought here. Maybe this will finally be the year I bite the bullet and get some help to keep my home… just okay.
Anyway, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to grab a bowl of porridge - because who needs a full meal when you can live your best life on warm oats? 🙃
